Loving my Baby, Hating my Skin Cancer

I definitely have a lot to talk about. This may be a little long. The past few months have been amazingly joyful but also I've had a few days of terror. First let me tell you how much I love being a mom. I love waking up to Trey happily talking to himself in the morning. By far the best alarm clock ever invented.. He's such a happy baby these days. His chubby cheeks and little giggles are just too cute to handle! I'm so happy that so far I've been able to be home with him and watch him learn new things every day. I love him more then words can express. That's why when I found out I had melanoma skin cancer, Trey was the first thing that came to my mind.

Sometime between a year and two years ago on a drive home from the gym Kade noticed a dark mole on my thigh. He said, "Is that thing new? It's pretty ugly looking. I think you better get that checked out." I thought to myself "Oh yeah right I've got lots of moles I'm sure that ones been there a while." After all I'm young, skin cancer is something you worry about when  you are your moms age. That's when I'll start wearing goofy hats and staying out of the sun. Not right now while I'm living in tan city St. George in my young adulthood! Over the next year, along with more concerned comments from Kade I noticed that maybe the mole was starting to change. I thought, "I'll get it checked out after I'm done being pregnant."

 So at the beginning of the summer I asked my sister Renee for the phone number to her dermatologist and made an appointment. He was so booked out that I had to wait all summer for my appointment at the end of August. I kept inspecting it was getting a little worried about the noticeable change it was having. At the appointment the nurse practitioner said it looked worrisome and scraped it off as well as two others. They said the biopsy results would take about two weeks to get back. So I went on with life thinking, "I'm sure it's no big deal. Hopefully." They finally called on a Friday morning, but since I rarely receive phone calls these day I didn't have my phone close by me and missed it. So I enjoyed a nice weekend in Logan with Kade's family and anticipated calling first thing Monday morning. I was totally unprepared for the news on the other end. The nurse practitioner said that two of the moles were precancerous and needed to be removed. I thought it was no big deal and was getting ready to wrap up and hang up the phone. Then she said, "And the worst news is, that the one on your leg is melanoma. (silence) So we're gonna need to schedule surgery to get that removed as soon as possible. (silence) Do you know what melanoma is? It's the worst form of skin cancer." I got the largest frog in my throat and could only choke out "Ok." Luckily we were able to schedule the surgery for the next morning.

After I got off the phone my eyes immediately went to Trey playing so blissfully unaware on the floor with his brightly colored toys. My eyes welled up with tears and I thought "I don't want to die. I want to be Trey's mom." The nurse had given my no indication of how serious it was and I immediately thought the worst. How could this be? I'm so young. I just had a baby. How could I have skin cancer and possibly die from this at such a young age? I was absolutely devastated. It was by far the worst day of my life. I'm so used to people helping me out with my problems, but this was something I knew no one could just fix for me. No matter how much I wanted Kade or my mom to make it just go away, I knew there was a possibility this was deadly serious. I cried all day and cuddled with Trey hoping his smile could ease the pain I felt in my heart for the fear of losing my earthly time with him. That night Kade gave me a blessing and I felt at peace knowing that it was in the Lord's hands now.

The next morning Kade, Trey and I went to the doctor's office hoping for the best news possible. And fortunately that's what I heard. The doctor informed me that biopsy indicated that the melanoma was at the earliest stage possible, stage 0. And that the surgery would most likely be able to get all of the melanoma out.  He said, "If you have melanoma, this is the melanoma to have." I went home with 8 stitches and a newer, brighter outlook on life. Why have I been taking life for granted? Expecting to wake up every morning like its just a given. Every day that God gives us is a gift to be with our friends and family. And although I'm not terrified of dying, I am scared of taking for granted all the joys this life has to give. I'm more scared of forgetting God's blessings for me.

Yesterday morning I learned that the biopsy from the surgery indicated that they were able to remove all of the melanoma from my body. I feel such joy knowing that I don't have to worry how many days are numbered of being with my husband and baby.

From this experience I have learned many things. It's not worth it to have a golden tan. It may look good for a few days, but that is irrelevant if you don't have your life anymore. From now on I need to focus on my inside more than my outside. I hope I am able to remember this great lesson and forget not the tender mercies of the Lord. I'm gonna have a long life of getting moles checked and biopsied, because the chances of getting melanoma again are a bit high for me. But, right now I can rejoice in the beautiful world and love all around me.


Take a lesson from Trey. Life is about being happy!

Loving my Baby Hating my Skin Cancer

I definitely have a

Maybe I should....

 Maybe I should blog a smidge. After all this is the only form I have of somewhat keeping a journal! And it would be a shame if I didn't remember how amazing the last few months have been! Not a piece of cake that's for sure, but sooo rewarding and joyful! Treyden Lee Sorensen was born on April 29th weighing in at a fairly hefty 8lbs. 6 oz. and a lengthy 21 inches. I had to be induced a week over my due date because Trey (despite my efforts) just didn't want to come out on his own! Labor went pretty well (thanks to the epidural) but then pushing lasted about oh almost 4 hours! No biggie. Sike! It was really frustrating, because I told myself I was gonna pop him out in 5 or 10 minutes but that turned out not to be the case. Oh well, it was a good workout that's for sure!
 The doctor, nurses, Kade and myself were all surprised at how big he was! We had no idea what size he would be and everyone (yes doctor included) guessed he'd be on the smaller side. (I take a little pride in that people thought he'd be small by looking at me to be 100% honest. Not that I'm looking fab by any means these days!) But he is now the complete opposite!! He just had his 2 month check-up and is in the 94th percentile for weight and the 90th percentile for weight! He's a 14 pounder chunky monkey! What can I say I am a good cow! Ha classic joke I know, something my mom likes to say.
Being a mom has been the most rewarding experience of my life. I fall more and more in love with him everyday. I know every single mom on the planet thinks their child is cute, but seriously he is so freaking adorable! I can't even handle it sometimes!!! When he was first born we thought he seemed pretty laid back and chill. I think maybe now his true colors are starting to shine in that he is passionate about life! When he's happy he is really happy! Biggest smile, loves to talk, starting to laugh. (Although he does seem to laugh more in his dreams than in real life which makes me wonder what his dreams are and why he likes them more than he likes me!(( jealousmom.com right here)) ) When he's mad he is real ticked and not afraid to let you know it!! Then again maybe that's just all babies. Go figure. Guess I'll find out on the next one?
 I'm so happy that we have been blessed to have such an amazing baby boy and I could not love him more or be more grateful that he is happy, healthy and handsome!

Bumpin

Baby baby baby baby....oh, I'm like.....

HEY! WE'RE HAVING A LITTLE BABY BOY. I'M SO EXCITED! He is due April 22, I am exactly halfway through creating him right now hehe. The pregnancy is going by so fast and I'm sure it will feel like no time before I'm a mommy! For some reason I just knew it was a boy in my womb. I even couldn't help resist buying some boy clothes on black Friday. My gut (probably actually the fetus himself) said, "It's a boy in here." Here's a little pic from the ultrasound This isn't showing his little boy parts, I decided you don't need to see it. You can just trust me that he's a boy. :) It may look like he's flipping you off right now. But he's actually saying "I'm number 1!!"

Here's my 5 month bump! I know its not huge yet, but I'm starting to look pudgtatstic :)

WE'RE SO EXCITED! Keep ya posted.

Tomorrow!

I'm so excited for tomorrow!!!! It's taken so long for this day to get here. Tomorrow we shall have a great announcement! YaY!!

That's all.

2 years of Marriage and a trip to Cali

A couple months ago (June 26th to be exact) Kade and I celebrated our two year anniversary! I can't believe it's already been that long. Time is flying by! It's nice being close to Vegas for a quick getaway. Here we are the Bellagio fountains, not that you can tell, we just look like angels or something.

Last week we went to California with my family! It was so much fun! We already miss it. We rode some intense rides at Knott's berry farm. A few of which I was terrified on! After a few days in Anaheim we moved on down to the beautiful city of San Diego. Here's a few pics of things we did there. We went to the beach, the San Diego Zoo, and visited the beautiful temple. It was so much fun to spend time with family and get a little change of scenery. The funniest/weirdest part of the trip happened at the Zoo, when we caught two large turtles mating. Lets just say those turtles surprised us all! Overall it was a Fabulous Vaca!

Mmmm Hmmm!!

Summer again, woot woot! I can't believe that we have lived in St. George a whole year. I think it keeps getting better and better. STG is the best! We've been going boating lately (thanks to some awesome new friends in the ward!!) The first time we went Kade got a little too sunburned though...... poor guy was in pain for a whole week. Kade doesn't like the greasy feel of sunscreen so he opted for a trendy long sleeved shirt the next time we went haha. His new nick name is RomeoI'm not great at wakeboarding, but I really do enjoy it! I haven't done it in years and its so much fun! I'm just really enjoying any fun things we can do together and try to have as much fun as we can this summer! Our 2 year anniversary is this weekend, hopefully we make a fun weekend getaway out of it!

Kade also has found some softball teams to play on and I love when I get to go watch him hit some homeruns!!

FRIENDS!

I love friends! Fortunately, I've been seeing a lot of them lately! Last month some gal pals came down for a trip to visit Georgetown/Vegas!

We hiked and gaggled and played all day! So fun! The weather has been amazing in St. George lately! I love being able to jog outside in the winter and get a tan in March!

This last weekend we went to moab for the 3rd annual half marathon girls trip! I'm rather proud of myself because I got my fastest time thus far 2 hours and 3 minutes (That's really good for me ok?) I think I'm going to keep up my endurance and possibly do another half marathon sometime this year, still not sure if I'll ever work up to a marathon.... it seems a little to nutty to be fun! It's pure torture to the human bod really. Here's some neat pics of the backyard of our condo.

(What a cute family pic huh?)

I don't have any pics of finishing the crossing line, but I hope to get some from my the friends cameras. Alright that's all I got for now. Still loving it here. Still loving life. Still loving this hottie bo bottie!

FRIENDS!

I love friends! Fortunately, I've been seeing a lot of them lately! Last month some gal pals came down for a trip to visit Georgetown/Vegas!

We hiked and gaggled and played all day! So fun! The weather has been amazing in St. George lately! I love being able to jog outside in the winter and get a tan in March!

This last weekend we went to moab for the 3rd annual half marathon girls trip! I'm rather proud of myself because I got my fastest time thus far 2 hours and 3 minutes (That's really good for me ok?) I think I'm going to keep up my endurance and possibly do another half marathon sometime this year, still not sure if I'll ever work up to a marathon.... it seems a little to nutty to be fun! It's pure torture to the human bod really. Here's some neat pics of the backyard of our condo.

(What a cute family pic huh?)

I don't have any pics of finishing the crossing line, but I hope to get some from my the friends cameras. Alright that's all I got for now. Still loving it here. Still loving life. Still loving this hottie bo bottie!

Christmas Stuff

I loved December! It's my favorite month for a few reasons. #1 My Birthday! Kade and I shopped and went and saw tangled for my b-day, cutest movie ever! Recently lots of strangers have been asking me how old I am (people at wal-mart, people I serve at work, people on the streets, etc) and it feels good to say "23" to which they seem to be surprised. I guess I have a young face? (This is me at about exactly the time I turned 23, 7:37 pm.)

#2 Christmas/Family! We got to spend a lot of time with family for Christmas we were up for 10 days of holiday fun! I'm still obsessed with my nieces and it might even be a little bit annoying to my sister and sisters-in-law with how much I maul them :)

One of the few Christmasy things Kade and I did was the live nativity at Tuachan

I also got to see all my friends at the friend christmas party! Love and miss having friends! When I get to see them I can't seem to pull myself away from them till it's pretty dang late and Kade's almost to bed! (He understands though, he thinks its funny how hyper I come home after hanging out with them)

I guess we payed for having so much fun, because since we've been back we've been down with the bubonic plague. We're both still recovering and have rarely left our house. So far 2011 has been a home body year! But I have high hopes it shall be great!! The end.

Ok, here's some stuff

• The other day I saw a frugal gorilla at the grocery store. I mean it's one thing to see a gorilla at the grocery store, but a money conscious gorilla! Now that's something else!

(OK it's Kade, he's funny in case you didn't know)

• Just when I thought these babies couldn't get any cuter.....

(I didn't even mean to match them!)

• Some weddings! Gish, Kade's best friend, got married in Logan and my friend Tawni got married here in St. G. Unfortunately I don't have pictures of Tawni's, but I loved seeing all these happy newlyweds!

• I'm loving life right now, St. George in fall is so nice! I'm glad to be out of the snowy tundra of Logan....no offense Loganites!

Bahhh! I've got nothing to say

I like...

I like....Zumba! I can't help it. I just love to dance everyday. Back in the day (the single days that is) I loved to go to dance parties, and ever since we got married I have felt a void of dancing. Don't get me wrong I still have dance parties in my living room, but it's just not quite the same. So as of late I have been thinking about becoming Zumba certified and instructing. The only thing holding me back is my nerves about trying out for jobs and if I can get a room full or women to do the cheesy "woot woot" on certain moves. Perhaps someday I'll get up the nerves and do it, because lets face it I'm not exactly in a career with my psych degree.

I like... my family. As amazing as beautiful St. George is the drawback is a lack of family. When Renee and Thomas took back their cute lil Kate to her real home after a visit I almost cried. I said to Kade, "They took my baby. I miss my baby!" I don't like all my nieces growing up without me around. No fair.

I also like this..... Molly, doing her thing, just watching tele. Like all normal dogs do in their free time!

I like....

I like.....Zumba! Why you ask? I just do! I've started going to Zumba when we moved down here to St. George and I have to say it makes me happy every day. Back in the day (the single days) I looooved dance parties and since we've been married I have felt a void from not being able to dance as much. Don't get me wrong I still have dance parties by myself in the living room, but it's just not the same. Lately I have been thinking about getting Zumba certified and becoming an instructor, my only dilemma is if I have the guts to go through with it. I'm not sure if I can handle the the nerves of trying out at gyms for jobs and getting women to yell cheesy "woot woots!", during certain maneuvers. Maybe eventually I'll get the nerves to do it, because so far I'm not exactly in a career with my Psych degree.

I like....my family. I miss them, and even though it's been a while since they came down, here is a picture of Kate, my cute lil neice. When Renee and Thomas took her back to her real home I almost cried and said to Kade, "They took my baby! Where's my baby?" :(

I like....Molly. She's funny. Sometimes you can't tell she's 15 years-old. Here she is chilling/watching tv. You know, just doing her thing.

Molly, Bulgy, Blue Gill, MTC

This is our new dog MOLLY, her owners Fred and Vanna (Kade's parents) recently left for their mission to Jamaica and of course couldn't bring her with them. Molly's 15 years-old and yes I'm gonna try to teach her new tricks. She's a sweetie.

Sunday we had a family party at Kade's sister's house. It was fun! Lots of food.

Monday we dropped Fred and Vanna off at the MTC. We helped them bring their luggage to their room and I had a small glimpse into the life of a missionary.

Tuesday we went to Lagoon with my sweet Mom, Ryan, Renee, Isabel and Lucy. It was so fun! I love Lagoon, this is Isabel riding BULGY the Whale (or as she called it, "Wedgy the Whale!"

Speaking of nieces we got to see another new niece, McKenzie! I love all my nieces, and although I don't really fit in this picture I hope it displays my love for them!

One thing Kade is doing for fun is fishing in a pond near our house. He is a master at catching BLUE GILLS. He caught about 12 of these little guys in a row, but of course he released them! We're hoping we can find more fun things like that to do around these parts.